salmandarion

While I didn't manage to win dirty underwears from Pachinko machines, there are still funny moments to relish from the recently concluded trip to North East Asia (which I affectionately label as 'The Confucius Journey'). Here's some of them in China:

Speaking of good propaganda, here are some golden rules to live by in China.

"Resist Superstition!"

salmandarion

Hardcore Season 3 is starting soon and this time, it won't have a Euro-centric theme. It features brand new destinations in the Far East. While there would be a lack of boisterous antics from drunk angmohs, I anticipate funny antics from the Asian equivalents. More butt twisting photo taking stances, more cultural confusions and more funny stuff ensue (since I will be able to understand the locals now).

And the grand aim of Hardcore 3? Winning a pair of dirty knickers by playing Pachinko in Japan. Wish me luck! Dirrty!

Currently listening to: Dirrty, Christina Aguilera

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Day 12 - 15 (Milan - Italy / Madrid, Sevilla - Spain)

Where was I previously? Right. The Grandfather story continues...

So I left the mosquito infested, tourist hoarded Venice for some other place. I seriously needed to go somewhere new to refresh my senses for the unknown. After sweating it out in stinky Venice, it was time for fashionable Milan.

We arrived at Milano train station unfashionably in run down clothes that are probably over washed, crumpled from the train ride and dirty rucksacks over our shoulders. It was a crazy 4 hours in Milan as we had to do our shopping in haute couture boutiques down the bourgeois boulevard and return to the train station within the given time to catch a bus for the airport. We were to fly to Madrid in the evening.

We perspired, we walked, we shopped and bought absolutely fuck all. I think the only contribution to the city's GDP was the sweat we left on some of the clothes we tried on. We only made it for the buses to the airport in the nick of time after some frantic walking in the unforgiving sun. 4 hours and it was adios to the fashion capital of the World. Somehow, this didn't do the city justice. I made a silent promise that I will be back to appreciate this city's architecture grandeur, shopping scene and beautiful people. I have really nothing to report on Milan except it was crazy walking, talking, sightseeing and shopping in that 4 hours but, I enjoyed it. I was probably operating at my maximum efficiency then.

Starting point of the Milan shopping mayhem

It was then Bueno Dia to Madrid in the evening. We arrived at night and the good news was that the locals eat dinner at 10pm onwards. The bad news...well...not many people speaks English even in the capital. It was up to my frantic sign language and excellent pointing skills to get myself some food. The experience felt so surreal and medieval. Hahaha.

I spent a good bunch of time shopping down the hot streets of Madrid while admiring its lavish architecture really. In hindsight, shopping got the better of me when everything was going at such a low price. It was the summer clearance sale and Springfield et al were going for 20 bucks. It was a MAJOR distraction. It was no wonder one of my dear friend lost 1900EUR to the Spanish merchants here a year ago  - purely through shopping.

This was a major distraction too...

I did enter the extravagently designed Royal Palace where the Spanish monarch used to live. They decided they wanted to shift to somewhere simpler as ironically, they thought it was too extravagent for their taste. I thought it was probably too hot for them to handle the Spanish summer heat though with all the thick rugs and walls.

Madrid Royal Palace. Too extravagant, too hot.

I thought everything in Spain was pleasant and smooth going, apparently until 2 women came up to me and attempted to give me a coin which was supposed to give me 'buona fortuna' if I went inside a cathedral nearby with that coin in my wallet. I took that coin, took out my wallet and they insisted to put into my wallet while they removed the coin from my hand and kissed it. Something was amiss. I held on to one end of my wallet tightly as I felt their nimble hands (well...not so nimble) trying to sneak out a 100EUR note and my NUS matriculation card.

OK..these 2 lovely ladies just turned big time whores/sluts/bitches had just pissed me off big time. These bitches didn't know what they had gotten themselves into. They had my 100 EUR note and unfortunately for them, I had some prior experience with fucking gypsies. I knew the first person who did the act is always a distraction and the second person is the one you should really go for kill. They made their tag-team tag and I knew my green note was in there. Enraged, I shook the second woman, shouted at her and slapped her hand that was holding my note. I think that shocked her a little and the crumpled note fell out of her hand. Perhaps it was the first time they were experiencing a retaliatory action from an Asian who is stereotypically submissive.

I claimed victory by grabbing the torn piece of paper and told them in their faces that they really are fucking sluts. I stopped short of physical abuse and walked off in triumph and angst. How dare these fuckers betrayed my friendship, goodwill and trust in front of a cathedral!? They will be forever damned, cursed and burned in hell! 

Madrid may be filled with them but the exprience was certainly not a bed of roses.

Well at least they reminded me that I should be prudent with money (and trust) in Madrid and that kind of stopped me in my tracks to go crazy shopping in the Spanish capital.

While I had the urge to go partying at night, the sour incident just made me want to stay in the air conditioned hostel and sleep. Furthermore, my travelling partners were not exactly night animals and weren't keen on any activities after 10pm anyways. Oh well.

We took a night bus the next evening to rich Seville in the wee hours of the morning. We had to walk what seemed like 3 km to the hostel on foot due to a lack of transportation at 4am. Some annoying American girl asked us if we know our way to a hostel but we kinda ditched her when she didn't turn up from her long overdued toilet trip she made. We didn't know our way then too and had to rely on instincts and a poorly drawn map. The last thing we needed was to lead a whiny girl with an annoying accent in the early morning with us.

The white pigeons of Seville. World Peace...

We got our arses to the hostel, it was full and we slept on the floor in the baggage holding area. It was lights out on the cold hard floor in Seville while waiting for the day to break. 

Currently listening to: Hysteria - Muse
Currently feeling: okay

salmandarion

It's amazing that I get the passion to write more when I know truckloads of work is just about to reel in. I call this one, "Laziness Prevails". I like to mix things up a little. As opposed to spreading my lessons thin and end up going to university for a short duration everyday, I'm doing the exact reverse. Let's see how it goes.

*****

Day 9 - 11 (Piran - Slovenia / Venice - Italy)

To bring us back on track, we are still on the topic of Slovenia, my current favourite destination to visit (together with a certain neighbouring country).

Who could have imagined that the country possess charming seaside Venetian towns too after also having a vibrant capital and some kickass mountainous-coniferous Alpine regions? Piran is one charming place to visit and just relax.

Actually, I wanted to do NOTHING in the small lazy town for that day to take a good break after a 1 week heave-ho. However, fortune dictates that I stay for a second day to truly enjoy the surroundings. It turns out the Italian-operated transport company decided to not work on Sundays which 'ruined' my plan to get out of Piran. Moreover Italy was going to play in the World Cup final match on that day. In hindsight, I should thank them for I really enjoyed the extra time I get to spend there.

Nothing interesting was done really. All I did was to get up late, spend the afternoon swimming in the Adriatic sea, dry myself in the warm sunshine, only to get myself wet again by jumping back into the sea for 4-5 straight hours. Afterwhich, it is off to dinner at a overpriced restaurant next to the coast to dine while watching the sun set. Food was great and so was the beer. A happy belly, nicely tanned skin, watched adorable toddlers playing by the sea and of course some eye candies. That was a perfect day for any seaside vacation.

*Munch*...*Gobble*....Yum!

And so, 2 rejuvenating days to catch up on sleep and relaxation zoomed by and it was time to get our arses to Venice....annoyingly. To be frank, I didn't want to include in my itinerary for 2 reasons. Firstly, I've been there not too long ago. Secondly, I didn't really enjoy it then. I did a little leap of joy when I found out we don't have to stay there for 2 days but 1 instead.

Alluring evening - enough to make me stay another day.

What I did was to walk around Venice leisurely a la walking in my backyard with no specific destination in mind. Anyhow, it is an experience to get lost in the Venetian alleyways - only this time, I didn't get lost enough. I could still remember my way through the streets fairly well without the aid of a map. While it was not enjoyable-enjoyable, it was alright. However, I was glad to spend just one night instead of two in Venice. The night in the Venetian hostel was comparable to sleeping in an oven filled with mosquitoes. The dilemma of taking my shirt off to beat the heat and risk getting stung throughout the night was truly maddening! 

One of the few token pictures I took this time round

After what seemd like an eternity, the moon faded, the day broke and the nightmare ended... It was good riddance to the mosquito ridden hostel. 

*****

Disclaimer: This summary version of my travelogue is starting to sound like a documentary work and is done at the request of some (you know who you are!). Juicy/naughty bits are privately owned and are only shared within the course of my personal discretion.

salmandarion

Day 5 - 8 (Bled-Ljubljana, Slovenia)

This little gem on the map of Europe has always been overlooked and remains one of the most underrated travel destination... which is excellent for travellers like me! To make it stay that way, I would need to make sure you do not want to visit Slovenia after reading this. So before I proceed further, do look behind your shoulders to make sure there's no-one and say this out loud 10 times:

"I will not want to go to Slovenia after reading this...I will not...(looop)"

Now that we've gotten over the important bit, let's continue.

Bled is potentially the most romantic location in Europe. No...don't throw your Paris/Venice-esque defence statements at me for those 2 places have been far too screwed by tourists and evil retailers. Bled is the place which many poets, authors, day dreamers, tree huggers have thought, wrote and dreamt about. There's a small chapel built on an island sitting in the middle of a crystal clear lake and the only way to get there is to swim/row/pay someone to row. The landscape looks completely different in each season but remains fairytale-like. 

Who will be...team number 1?

Ahhh...just looking at the photo again makes my heart melt. Speaking of which, we met a Finnish lady, Marie, and that made my mate's heart melt. Well it was somewhat a joke but the uncanny penchant for food and god-like eating speed inherent in both of them would have made them a happy pair. I digress. Old habits die hard.

In short, the place was a nature lover's paradise. As if the lake wasn't enough, there are national reserves near Bled, around the Julian Alps region. I went to a nearer one and the walk along wooden planks built within the gorges was gorgeous (hahaa...I love my own puns!)! Vintgar Gorge. Even the walk to the gorge was refreshingly beautiful. Wild flowers, grass and simple looking houses.

The presence of the electric cables in the photograph just screams PHOTOSHOP!

It's a pity that we only had 2 days to explore the natural beauty. It's off to Slovenia's capital city, Ljubljana - where we had to walk almost an hour from the bus station to our hostel with our huge bags due to some miscommunication. Almost collapsed. Damn you Ms Nikki! However,  this lau chio's pretty friendly and helpful with all the information about the city. It's a love-hate relationship. Ha.

Ljubljana is a different story. While most capitals are stereotypically dirty, dull and congested with people, this Slovenian capital is bustling with life and young people are everywhere. Even the people selling newspaper and the muesum curators look barely 20. It's a sign that rapid economic development occuring and it's drawing youths to the capital for job opportunites, all thanks (or no thanks depending on which camp you belong to) to EU funding I guess.

The speed of development is so break-neck that they didn't had time to demolish old ones to house new projects. You can still see old crumbling buildings next to spanking new ones! Of course the contrast makes a good photo composition and how can I resist a quick snap?

 
*SNAP!* 

That night, it was decided that a little splurging is allowed and we went for dinner at a Slovenian restaurant. They really give HUGE serving of food everywhere within the city! While it has heavy Italian influence in its cuisine, the taste is unique. The night view was great too with lots of street bands strategically located next to the river. It was a moment to remember, really.

1,2,3....Ahhhhhhh......

*****

Disclaimer: This summary version of my travelogue is starting to sound like a documentary work and is done at the request of some (you know who you are!). Juicy/naughty bits are privately owned and are only shared within the course of my personal discretion. 

Currently listening to: I Want You - Paris Avenue
Currently watching: Project Runway
Currently feeling: cheerful